Will the real you please stand up!
On a recent training course I remember one of the delegates telling me how tired she got from work because “(she) could never be her true self at work”. This is a statement I have heard so many times and it always surprises me how many people have this belief in their heads.
Many people say they can’t be their real selves at work and can only truly be themselves when at home or with close friends. It is a myth that you have to put on an act at work – any time you spend striving to be someone you are not will take effort and drain your energy. People can tell when you are not being authentic. Get used to being more honest, open and assertive in all situations – strive to be the real you more of the time.
So how do you do this. Well actually, you need to develop a combination of areas from the Limbic Performance System.
Firstly, you must understand and be clear on your Personal Values – what matters most to you and life. Then you must develop your sense of self worth to be able to value yourself enough to stay true to your core values, and state openly and respectfully how you feel if someone steps on your values.
You also need a high level of self awareness, to notice how your instinct will tell you if you are playing a role and in a way not true to yourself.
Add into the mix effective conflict handling skills and a clear understanding of your personality and you are well on the way to a life of authenticity.
And what if you don’t? Well remember, it’s easy and effortless being you but it takes a lot of energy and effort to not be you!
All of the development areas mentioned in this blog are comprehensively covered in Steve Neale’s online programme, the Limbic Performance System for Outstanding Leadership.